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Just realised I can post this pic of wilma again, so angelic 👼

Pinned toot

The one good thing about moving instances is I get too post my favourite boof heads Solomon and Simon again

im reading a book where a woman fucks a cyborg and id like to confirm that id fuck a cyborg

sex mention 

hair removal works like this: you get fitter with each hair they pull out. that's why it's a multi million pound industry.

judging you all for your misplaced punctuation that is actually just dirt on my screen

🎵 When the moon hits you're eye
Like a big pizza pie
That's Melancholia 🎵

Picard asking for tea, earl grey……cold? He is wearing a cutoff version of his uniform, because it is summer in space at this moment

damn bro your lookin structurally unsound.......that ass looks dangerous. like it might collapse

falcon to the falconer, comically: I can't *heeaar* you!

Bruce Banner would do a hundred times more good for the world as a scientist than as a big green guy that gets angry and that's why superheroes suck as a general pattern. Get real jobs, ya super-bums.

My favorite X-Files character, The Lound-Bloughing Man

writing a bot that scans the federated TL for phone screenshots and tells people to charge their phone if their battery is less than 20%

i blame garfield cat for making me say epic out loud with my mouth

Pop punk lyricist’s notebook that’s just crossed out variations of like “I wish I didn’t live in this town” “Don’t want to stay in town” “We should go somewhere other than this small-town town”

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this godforsaken website

godforsaken.website is a uk-based mastodon instance boasting literally thousands of posts about bumholes and UNESCO world heritage sites