Show newer

@pisscotheque I've truly never seen a dog honk a horn with more confidence and abandon

after a while this old crustpunk guy came out of the kiosk and identified himself as the owner of the winnebago. he told us he had no idea the dog knew how to work the horn, which i highly doubt since the dog was operating it very confidently

Show thread

just stopped to get petrol and when we came out of the kiosk some dick parked at a pump in a winnebago started honking the horn at us. we got closer to give them a piece of our mind and it was a fucking dog

eye contact 

seems like everywhere i go now has one of these things. what is it 🤷

is it hot to drink poison, or is it hot to be immune to poison?

When I'm greeting someone wretched who is beneath me I say "What's up, worm?"

if I were a scientist with dubious ethics I would simply have not given chimpanzees brain-improving gene therapy and then let them escape, ultimately resulting in a planet of the apes. fucking amateurs

IRCed-up reply boy with a little bit of lag busts it down Federated style. is he bloated with the FOSS

is a sandwich a soup. is a car a leg. is a horse a table. is my ass a fruit. is


matzo matzo matzo balls!! i want to eat some matzo balllls

I'm going to marry a soprano or a professional wrestler

Show older
this godforsaken website is a uk-based mastodon instance boasting literally thousands of posts about bumholes and UNESCO world heritage sites