bartholomew the bearded baby @pisscotheque@godforsaken.website

if the vast body of popular culture that has been generated over the last 50 years has taught me anything, it's that i don't need to ever change my sheets or look at my credit score as long as i'm a loveable scamp

blaming my academic, professional and romantic failures on lag

Did you really think we would let you leave this place? After all that you’ve seen?

spotify is like 'music for everyone' but what about the dead or horses

nice sydney opera house you got here. would be a shame it if were to become the the sydney Lesbian house...

don't worry dude. vampires can't cum unless they're invited. what? no the rule is cumming in general. what do you mean by "cum in"? what are they cumming in

good morning to all of you scumbags and pieces of shit

my podcast is me lowering a microphone down a well in order to try and hear the desire of the earth

steely dan mindset

In Xanadu did Kubla Khan
A Steely pleasure-Dan decree

trans george foreman grill ???

@scribblefrog @pisscotheque

@pisscotheque @knownrobes this reminds me when I got the most blessed plane seat

@pisscotheque i like guest, as if there are mcdonalds residents

Tonight... the toilet pisses back

*peeing onto a vape pen and waiting three minutes* oh no i’m pregnant

*taking a long drag on a used pregnancy test* this vape is broken