pere uwu @pisscotheque@godforsaken.website

Youngledore, Dumbledore and Full of Cumbledore

me: working from home gives me the opportunity to focus on tasks free from the the distractions of a noisy office!

brain:

TROUT

TROUT

LET IT ALL OUT

THESE ARE THE FISH I CAN DO WITHOUT

SALMON

I’M TALKING TO YOU

SALMON

me: cool never mind

i shit my pants down in africa

STOP TRYING TO IMPROVE THE QUALITY OF DEBATE ONLINE. no right-thinking person goes onto online to find strangers to "debate" with. real people, ordinary, decent people, have only come online to view gifs of skeletons fucking

Now I'm falling asleep
And she's taking a shit
And he's taking a shit
And she's taking a shit

#boycottwetherspoons

i heard hanny and snakeboy got kicked out of wetherspoons for trying to hold a sapiosexual pride meeting in there... sapiophobia is real

last night we watched the shakespeare retold version of much ado and i drank an entire bottle of zinfandel rose by myself. it was like a historical re-enactment of a girls’ evening in under late-stage new labour

valid to subdue irascible women into marriage by bantering them into submission in my very humble experiecnd

say what you like about william shakespere but he sure as fuck knew how to write a story about how women are unreasonable bitches who will eventually chill the fuck out if your patter is good enough

carbon 🅱️onoxide 🅱️oisoning