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my switch friend code is 8569-4247-0009. please add me so you can set fire to my animal crossing town when the time comes

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my fuckin TRANSLATION PROJECT that i've been working on is finally finished and available!! Pere Ubu's Almanac is a hefty zine create by Alfred Jarry, the guy behind Ubu Roi and Exploits & Opinions of Dr Faustroll, in 1899. i don't think it's ever appeared in english translation before and i may have done a cack-handed job of it because i am a baby who has somehow learned to use a computer!! NEVERTHELESS monoclelash.wordpress.com/2019

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Youngledore, Dumbledore and Full of Cumbledore

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me: working from home gives me the opportunity to focus on tasks free from the the distractions of a noisy office!

brain:

TROUT

TROUT

LET IT ALL OUT

THESE ARE THE FISH I CAN DO WITHOUT

SALMON

I’M TALKING TO YOU

SALMON

me: cool never mind

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STOP TRYING TO IMPROVE THE QUALITY OF DEBATE ONLINE. no right-thinking person goes onto online to find strangers to "debate" with. real people, ordinary, decent people, have only come online to view gifs of skeletons fucking

croc 2 boosted
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anyone know where i can buy a katana? ive got some water bottles i need to defend my lady from

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how to use katana to take off diaper, set search to 'urgent'

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the moon is looking pretty bright tonight, love thinking about neil armstrong's feet, anyway, night

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everybody expects the sounds from my mouth that sound like they're from my ass, but nobody expects the sounds from my ass that sound like they're from my mouth

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waving my ass in my boyfriend’s face and yelling “SPECIAL GOODS” while he’s trying to play animal crossing

placing my used racketball shorts in a sausage shaped bag to mature until 2022

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a terrible mirror selfie (no eye contact) but pls know this is how i'm dressing for the whole lockdown, this is my entire spring wardrobe

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bb stands for 'buxom babe'. for example if someone calls you 'bb' in a text it means they're calling you a buxom babe, or if someone shoots you with a 'bb' gun they are shooting you with a buxom babe gun. it's simple.

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using my Ballsack as my official seal. pressing my Ballsack into hot wax for government purposes, and government purposes only.

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@pisscotheque those aren't tits amy. they're pockets. for my dogs things.

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this godforsaken website

godforsaken.website is a uk-based mastodon instance boasting literally thousands of posts about bumholes and UNESCO world heritage sites