if god had wanted two dogs to email each other, he would have given the dogs fingers, and blessed them with higher reason that they might learn to read. he’d have created a computer that dogs could use, and he would have called it the BarkTel 900. it would have a power cord that looked like a string of sausages, and all the keys would be shaped like little bones. but he didn’t, and that is why the religious right spent billions of dollars to suppress the special “all-dog cut” of You’ve Got Mail
@pisscotheque like a craven maggot you sit at your computer howling in despair at my posts as though you never once had the opportunity to strike my glowing weak points and end my life in person. pathetic.
"get out of bed" no?????
i can see some of the text on those mfs now, not to brag but im just on a different level to you people
I understand. You found paradise in America, had a good fish, made a good living. The killer whales protected you; and there were courts of shore. And you didn't need a friend of me. But uh, now you come to me and you say -- "Don Sealeone give me justice." -- But you don't ask with respect. You don't offer tummy scratches. You don't even think to call me Rotundfather. Instead, you come into my house on the day my equally adorable daughter is to be married, and you uh ask me to do sea-murder, for ocean-money.
godforsaken.website is a uk-based mastodon instance boasting literally thousands of posts about bumholes and UNESCO world heritage sites