reese wetherspoons @pisscotheque@godforsaken.website

my fuckin TRANSLATION PROJECT that i've been working on is finally finished and available!! Pere Ubu's Almanac is a hefty zine create by Alfred Jarry, the guy behind Ubu Roi and Exploits & Opinions of Dr Faustroll, in 1899. i don't think it's ever appeared in english translation before and i may have done a cack-handed job of it because i am a baby who has somehow learned to use a computer!! NEVERTHELESS https://monoclelash.wordpress.com/2019/12/07/pere-ubus-almanac-for-jan-march-1899-by-alfred-jarry/

Youngledore, Dumbledore and Full of Cumbledore

me: working from home gives me the opportunity to focus on tasks free from the the distractions of a noisy office!

brain:

TROUT

TROUT

LET IT ALL OUT

THESE ARE THE FISH I CAN DO WITHOUT

SALMON

I’M TALKING TO YOU

SALMON

me: cool never mind

STOP TRYING TO IMPROVE THE QUALITY OF DEBATE ONLINE. no right-thinking person goes onto online to find strangers to "debate" with. real people, ordinary, decent people, have only come online to view gifs of skeletons fucking

Now I'm falling asleep
And she's taking a shit
And he's taking a shit
And she's taking a shit

fucking offended about how many elements there are. you don't need most of those

*italian carly rae jepsen voice* YOU BREAKA MY BALLS, MOITE

i think the fact that my teen years coincided perfectly with both the first decade of the 2000s and the new labour's two terms in office has left my brain uniquely and irreparably fucked. i emerged into 2010 barely knowing what was real