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british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

oh my so many lols

- ireland was an "independent country" in the middle ages

- you see it was just the troops that went over, no lords and landowners at all

- "the" irish king... eh, no: _an_ irish king

- "remained to build their own settlements"... just minding their own business, nothing to see here

- "some" of the "important" people liked us, really!

british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@kiki Fucksake

british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@ghost_bird like none of it's surprising but it's always funny to see the delusion spelled out

british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@kiki The “citizenship test” is just literacy-test bullshit, but that means it’s going to be crammed with right-wing myths, alas.

british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@ghost_bird and how!

british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@kiki Kinda like "Thanksgiving" in the US but with less smallpox?

british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@nebula sort, of but the beats are very different

norman lords were invited over in the 12th century to help an irish king win a war - in return they got lands and he married his daughter Aoife to their leader, Richard de Clare

then normans took lands in other parts of the island but never had full control, and often integrated with local cultures

then the tudors came in the 16th century and the really brutal conquest started

british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@nebula like really thanksgiving is so much worse

re: british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@kiki Not disagreeing with you there

british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@kiki I had to do this test, it's wrong about everything and absolutely mythologizing.

british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@bright_helpings i feel very sorry for anyone who has to sit through this sort of inane nationalism

british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@bright_helpings @kiki

I think the part about who won the rugby in the 1960s and the length of the Bayeux tapestry are both probably right but I resent memorising that information.

I had to ask people not to correct the misinformation they saw me memorising so that I could pass the test.

british not-a-citizenship test 

@celesteh @kiki I remember, thirteen years later, the two questions from my test that I'm not sure I got right. One was about TV licences in a shared house (I'd never shared a house or owned a TV in the UK, so this was totally irrelevant to me) and my estate agent SIL told me "oh the rules on that have recently changed anyway" but she thought that meant I'd need the updated correct answer hahaha

british not-a-citizenship test 

@bright_helpings @kiki

I bungled the lyrics to god save the queen. Boring anthem, but it's not like I know the words to the Star Spangles Banner or anything else where I would have been more likely playing in the band than singing.

british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@kiki my jaw is on the floor but I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised

re: british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@dreadpirateyarr @kiki iirc there's a question that conveniently ignores the fact that the UK still holds military colonies in Cyprus

re: british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@GreenandBlack @kiki ‘some of the important lords in Cyprus accept the authority of the English queen’

re: british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@GreenandBlack @dreadpirateyarr like they could just entirely avoid asking questions that relate to brutal overseas conquests and stick to like town names or varieties of pasty or something, but they just can resist it

re: british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@kiki @GreenandBlack @dreadpirateyarr

It *could* cover civics. How does the parliamentary system work? What is the role of judges? What are the different levels of courts? What does the queen actually do? What's an early day motion? How do stakeholder make their views known to MPs? What's a shadow cabinet? What's a spad?

Like, things I actually want to know and would be useful for citizens.

re: british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@celesteh @GreenandBlack @dreadpirateyarr i mean yeah, questions on actual functional information would be much better, but then immigrants might get notions about their status and that wouldn't do

british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@dreadpirateyarr we never should be, and yet they still somehow always find new ways to impress

british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@kiki the most dark and cynical part of me thinks that this test is good because it will inform people that Britain is a deluded and cruel place that should be destroyed.

british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@kawaiipunk sadly i feel like it's more likely to engineer a pavlovian response of existential weariness whenever the subject of british history is raised

british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@kiki When Kehinde Andrews said that whiteness is a psychosis on Good Morning Britain, I felt that.

british citizenship questionnaire, question about ireland 

@kawaiipunk that is painfully accurate

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