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Hi I'm Alex (he/him), 30-something artist in Scotland.
I like experimental art, unusual music and weird horror films. I studied a semester in Japan and can speak some Japanese.
I'm disabled with ME/CFS, a chronic illness that leaves me mostly housebound. I'm always open to connecting with other disabled comrades onhere.
I've been on Masto for a few years and I would describe my posting style as a one-two punch of silly nonsense and debilitating sincerity.

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code 

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yeah! it's an in-browser Mastodon archive reader that fits in a toot!

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Shareable document version, Housebound advice from a long-term housebound person, boosts ok 

Here's a free downloadable zine version of this thread, edited a little, with contributions from others. It's released under a sharealike noncommercial license, so please feel free to pass it on to anyone you think might find it useful. ❤️
drive.google.com/open?id=19FIH

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something i’ve been meaning to post a while about interactions onhere:
i’m always extremely low on energy so if you reply to one of my posts i won’t always reply back. especially if it’s on a jokey post and you’re trying to continue the joke – i usually just can’t keep that going! i can usually come up with a handful of good arrangements of words in a day. it’s nice of you though!

alex boosted

Here's a little illustration I did for a small pride event featuring queer artists. I call it "Klimt - But Gay" haha

#MastoArt #illustration #lgbtq

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wouldn't it be cool if every mention of global imperial colonialism wasn't colonised by Irish Scottish and Welsh people going "oh me too me too".

it's not the same thing mate, it's not the same thing, nowhere near the same thing. nationalist population manipulation and colonialism intersect, but they are vastly different, and not only but your folk's history regarding colonialism excludes you from most of that discussion. you *are* white colonists.

covid, pandemic, western orientalism, islamophobia 

imo, a significant part of the base rhetoric for western anti-mask stuff was laid out during the big secular anti-muslim wave that kicked off in the 2000s. all kinds of liberal public intellectuals were coming up with bullshit reasons to demonise "face covering" (read: Muslim hijabi practices). esp see France's ways of criminalising Muslim women. they had to come up with so much sophistry to pretend it was about anything other than phobia.

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covid, pandemic, western journalists' orientalism, anti-asian racism 

murdoch fash rag The Sunday Times (spit) doing a "why are 'The Japanese' hiding behind masks" bit (as the tweet points out, in the same issue they worry about an epidemic of long covid). honestly so much of the weird manufactured anti-mask sentiment in the west is built on a stratum of anti-Asian racism.

twitter.com/KashPrime/status/1

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@alex patient: (taking off costume) wait, but I am pagliacci

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One of my greatest fears is going to NYC & having that humansofnewyork fella approach me to take my portrait & instead of having something cool & profound to say like most people all I can come up with is “I like hamburgre”

doctor: the great clown pagliacci is in town. go to see him, it will make you feel better. tickets start at £10.
patient: wow, thanks doctor, i will go and do that. (leaves)
pagliacci: (taking off doctor costume) hehe another sale

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food 

@alex do we need a Cornish pasty when we have a Forfar bridie? What does a dundonian need from Greggs when they have Clarke's?

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food 

@alex am I right that the West Cornwall Cornish Pasty Company don't seem to have any shops in, er, West Cornwall? Seems odd,

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food 

@alex there's one in Glasgow Central! I think the Scottish ones must be undercover. Or maybe they're illegally using the brand and that's a pirate pirate logo.

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food 

@alex doing better than the Romans did tbf

food 

basically, the longer the distance they have to transport cornish pasties from their place of origin (cornwall), the greater the risk that the convoy will be raided by pirates who, above all, crave their favourite meal: cornish pasties. at distances like the one between cornwall and scotland, the "pirate number" approaches 100%. it's basically an inevitability at that distance. no one's gonna risk that.

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Selfie 

@alex it's so sad when this happens. a problem without a solution. the pasties would go bad in the time it took for them to arrive in scotland in the horse drawn carriage used to transport them

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food 

look at this absolute bastard pirate guy. he has managed only one incursion past Hadrian's Wall.

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food 

i did all this extra bakery trek with a heavy backpack full of groceries on, like one of those military training exercises. just one of many ways in which i am braver, and in fact much stronger, than the average soldier.

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food 

the wee lassy at the bakery was behind a perspex screen and i was wearing a mask so she couldn't really hear my order properly. i ended up with a different type of bridie than i'd asked for, and a totally different cake made almost entirely out of cream. reader i still fuckin ate both!!!!!!

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food 

nah they had bridies, which are like the scottish equivalent of a pasty, however, crucially, not as good. i still got one and it didn't really hit the weirdly specific spot i needed.

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Selfie 

@alex hoping against hope, that you may find a pasty today :sparkles_pink: 🤞 :sparkles_pink:

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this godforsaken website

godforsaken.website is a uk-based mastodon instance boasting literally thousands of posts about bumholes and UNESCO world heritage sites